Kunzang Pantso
I first came to Gebchak Gonpa when I was 15 and now I am 23. In my very first year here I had the job of looking after the yaks. After that I completed two sets of preliminary practices, and then I spent a year doing 100 sets of Nyung Naes[1]. Then I did the accumulation retreat of Vajrakilaya[2], and once I finished that I began my three-year retreat. It has now been a little over three years since I finished my three-year retreat.
My yidam[3] is Vajrasattva[4], and I currently have the responsibility of being the leader in my retreat division.
Question: How did your mind change in your three-year retreat?
Kunzang Pantso: I developed complete renunciation of samsara. Thinking about the sufferings to come in the future, I now feel an unshakable resolve to get out of samsara. My mind can no longer be discouraged toward this goal.
Q: When you were a young girl, what were your thoughts before becoming a nun?
Kunzang Pantso: I liked the life of a nun, and I didn’t like samsara. Due to Tsang-Yang Gyamtso’s[5] compassionate blessings, I was inspired and entered Gebchak Nunnery with the wish to stay in retreat.
Q: Did your parents support you in this decision?
Kunzang Pantso: Yes, as well as my siblings. I have three younger brothers – one is a monk at Khenpo Jigme Phuntsok’s monastery, another is at Achen Rinpoche’s monastery, and the youngest is at home with my parents. My family is very religious.
Q: Has it been difficult doing all the intensive retreats and practices you have done so far – for example, never being able to leave the three-year retreat house, or sharing such a small space with the 18 other nuns in retreat with you, or not sleeping more than three hours a night?
Kunzang Pantso: No, it was never really difficult. As long as I remembered the Dharma and my future lives, I remained happy.
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Q: Why do you have such s strong renunciation of samsara? What are its faults?
Kunzang Pantso: All the higher and lower six realms of samsara are by their nature suffering, and there is no real freedom until we reach the spiritual level of no return. Only then will there be no more suffering rebirths in samsara. I strongly pray to my root lama, Tsang-Yang Gyamtso Rinpoche, with the great aspiration to reach this level.
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Q: The physical conditions at Gebchak Nunnery are quite difficult. Your food is not very good, neither are the buildings. You never get to go on any holidays, you have to be separated from your parents, and the weather becomes extremely cold. What is the reason why you are so happy?
Kunzang Pantso: Because I’ve got this precious human life. I’ve met with an authentic lama, and I’ve received practice instructions from him and from my other teachers. I really feel how precious this life of Dharma is.
Q: Do you have complete faith that you can become liberated from samsara?
Kunzang Pantso: Yes, I do.
Q: And this state of liberation from samsara, what is it like?
Kunzang Pantso: Once you reach the level of no return, you can go to Dewachen[6] where you don’t need to wander in samsara, and there you can quickly get enlightened.
If your mind is attached to samsara, then that is where you will stay. If you’re not attached to samsara, then you can get free and go to the true happiness of buddhahood.
Q: What qualities do enlightened beings have to accomplish the benefit of others?
Kunzang Pantso: They have great blessings to help others. I pray to reach the same state of enlightenment myself.
Q: Isn’t it difficult living everyday in your meditation box? Doesn’t your body ache?
Kunzang Pantso: No, it doesn’t, due to the kindness of the Three Jewels. Our system of practicing in meditation boxes was set out by Tsang-Yang Gyamtso, and so it is very blessed.
In the beginning it was difficult to sit like that and my knees hurt, but then after two or three months it became fine, and now I can sit like that for as long as I want.
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Q: Nowadays you practice continuously in your Vajrasattva retreat division. What would you say is at the heart of your practice?
Kunzang Pantso: Mainly the Four Reversals, the four thoughts that turn the mind from samsara: the rarity of a precious human rebirth, death and impermanence, the inevitable results of karma, and the faults of samsara. Mainly I think about these in my practice sessions. If you don’t have these thoughts then your attitude in your practice is no good. We need to practice with an understanding of impermanence, how rare human life is, and so forth. First we must meditate on these thoughts, and based on them we can practice Dzogchen and Mahamudra. These Four Reversals are really at the heart of my practice.
Q: Can you tell me more about the reasons your mind is so happy? Is it because you have the faith that you are going to buddhahood?
Kunzang Pantso: Yes, I have this faith and happiness. If you have the faith that you can achieve buddhahood, then you can achieve it. If you don’t believe that you can achieve buddhahood, then you can’t achieve it, can you?
Q: How did you develop such a faith?
Kunzang Pantso: From my lamas Tsang-Yang Gyamtso and Pema Drimey, and from my spiritual teachers like Khenpo Kargon – from all of them I learned about the suffering nature of samsara, the preciousness of human life, impermanence and so forth, and that through good practice we can go to a Buddhist pure land in our next life.
Q: How many nuns are there in your retreat division? Does it ever disturb you living in the same room everyday and night with so many other nuns? Like for example, if others are talking while you’re trying to meditate?
Kunzang Pantso: No, not at all! The nuns here are all [gives the thumbs up gesture]! Among the nuns here at Gecbhak there are never any disputes. This is due to Tsang-Yang Gyamtso’s compassionate blessings.
Q: Now Gebchak Nunnery is quite poor, and in the future it will have to depend on relationships with many sponsors from modern, foreign countries. There is a big difference between the simple way of life here in Nangchen and that of the outside, developed countries where the pace of life is so busy and materialistic. How can Gebchak’s lineage of pure practice be preserved in the future?
Kunzang Pantso: In order to preserve Tsang-Yang Gyamtso’s lineage, his special system of practice that he established, each nun has to fulfill the instructions of the lama. If the teachings of Tsang-Yang Gyamtso are practiced and upheld by each nun, then his lineage will remain unbroken in the future, which is good. Otherwise, the lineage will be broken, won’t it? Therefore, all of the nuns now practice and pray strongly to maintain the practice in their future lives. And they pray that by Tsang-Yang Gyamtso’s compassionate blessings his lineage will remain forever and continue to flourish. All of the nuns pray in this way. It depends on the nuns themselves; as it’s taught that the teachings of the Buddha depend on the sangha, it depends on all of the nuns. The 84,000 teachings of the Buddha need to be upheld by the nuns, the sangha. If the nuns, the sangha, practice well, then the teachings of the Buddha, the lineage of Tsang-Yang Gyamtso will remain pure and grow ever greater.
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Q: Do you have a wish that in the future, once you feel you’ve accomplished the Dharma, you may teach the Dharma to others?
Kunzang Pantso: Yes, yes I do. Now I’m not able to teach others in this way. But I pray to the Buddha that in the future I may be able to teach and benefit all my mother sentient beings, and lead them to perfect buddhahood. Once I’m a buddha myself, this is my plan. All sentient beings of the six realms have at one time or another been our father or mother. All beings are our mothers! But under the power of karma they are being born again and again in samsara.
[1] Nyung Nae: a two-day purification of Chenrezig. On the second day the practitioner may not speak, eat, nor drink anything, and on both days many hundreds of prostrations are performed
[2] Vajrakilaya: Tib – རྡོ་རྗེ་ཕུར་པ།, a wrathful deity embodying enlightened activity. This deity is noted for being the most powerful for removing obstacles and destroying non-compassionate forces.
[3] yidam: personal meditational deity.
[4] Vajrasattva: Tib – རྡོ་རྗེ་སེམས་དཔའ།, A sambhogakaya buddha who embodies all of the five or hundred buddha families. He is also a support for purification practice.
[5]Tsang-Yang Gyamtso: the founder of Gebchak Nunnery. The first Tsang-Yang Gyamtso was a heart disciple of the first Drubwang Tsoknyi Rinpoche.
[6]Dewachen: Amitabha’s pure land of Great Bliss.
Note: Interview conducted in July, 2006, at Gebchak Gonpa, and translated by Tenzin Chozom.
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